Saturday, October 17, 2020

Spacemen Saturday Night

... time was goin' to the movies was somewhat an event... before the emergence of soulless, corporate run multiplex cinemas of the past forty years, theaters were for the most part mom and pop operations with a flair for showmanship and motion picture exhibition... first and foremost (to our affection) was the Saturday afternoon 'Super Spook Show Spectacular' - a two and sometimes four bill showing of cheesy Grade B Horror and SciFi flicks featuring a between feature stage show emceed by a ghoulish host, with ceiling dropping skeletons and spiders, audience buzzing bats and ghosts, and randomly scattered "electric shock" seat buzzers that always got an abrupt loud scream from the gals (and an occasional guy too) - in addition you had all the mayhem of an audience of two hundred screaming kids in a dark theater with consequential deviltry, all executed under a steady barrage of popcorn, milk duds, M&M's, malt balls and (the worst) hard candy fireballs and jawbreakers, all directed at the frontline (usually first ten seating rows), all delivered from rear seating (ground floor) and overhead aerial (balcony seating) assault - some "dug in" front row seating participants (veterans from prior shows) would go as far as bringing their plastic army helmets, cowboy hats etc.. to the event - but that just made ya' a bigger target - most would just lift their coats over head or set there with an empty popcorn box on their head until the ushers would restore some semblance of order to the proceedings, which always occurred at least by the end of the first feature... the highlight of the show was always the promoted appearance of a popular movie "monster", which was usually one of the ushers doin' double (hopefully hazard pay) duty dressed in a rubber Frankenstein mask and gloves, who would lumber across the stage to loud screaming sound track and flickering stage lights while artillery bombardment re-opened as the audience recognized the apparent "ruse"  and ushers scrambled to again restore order... talk about a good time...

 
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... Drive-In theaters delivered similar entertainment, although a lot more tame... minus the four-walled captive audience, along with the flicks the live entertainment was relegated to the snack bar concession which was decked in a horror motif of rubber bats, skeletons and the like, while zombies and vampires manned the behind counter operations and rubber-masked Wolf Men and Frankenstein monsters roamed the lobby floor and nearby grounds... occasionally beloved local TV horror show host 'Chilly Billy Cardille' (ref. previous post) would 'copter in for appearance and autograph signing - we had an autograph photo identical to the following - have no idea what ever happened to it...

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... "Chilly Billy"...

... the best Drive-In entertainment (other than lone accompaniment with a gal) was following the screening of then popular hot rod, biker and similar considered "juvenile delinquent" flicks, which, when let out at 1:30am, fifteen to twenty souped up Fords, Chevies and such, amped by the features, would go drag racing the highway back to town...

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... Invasion Of the Saucer-Men...

... we always enjoyed the flicks which featured peril, in the form of little green aliens, slithering blobs, disembodied crawling hands and such, to teenagers cruising backwoods country roads in souped-up rides between town, party and make-out spots (that's all everyone we knew pretty much did anyway come Friday and Saturday nights), the thoughts of which always got the gals to set a bit closer when alone on "location"...

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... although we could generate a list, for simplicity we'll discuss only one favorite which comes to mind - Invasion of the Saucer-Men (1957) - don't think that it's been shown on TV since Chilly Billy's late Saturday night Chiller Theater days - we understand that there's been no official DVD release because of legal and copyright issues (although, we possess an old DVD bootleg copy) - there's a copy available for viewing on YouTube - we checked it out, however, and it blows - all the saucer-men scenes have been edited out...

... we don't want to ruin the tale for those that haven't seen it, but in short it's a bunch of fun nonsense about a group of little green space aliens terrorizing the local lovers lane - the shrimps possess extractable hypodermic needle fingernails that inject 150 proof alcohol "venom" - their hands, which can disembody from a dead alien, possess a single cycloptic eye, and apparently have a mind their own, perfect for hidin' under the car seat, eventually to crawl up and over shoulder of the unsuspecting heroine... none of the adults believe the teenagers and in turn suspect them as boozing slackers - subsequently, the teenagers have to face the alien menace alone... you get the idea...

... some great saucer-men costumes by the great low budget special effects artist Paul Blaisdell - great special effects overall considering the low budget - we still prefer the old "plaster of paris, rubber band and paper clip" method of special effect production even when compared to multi million dollar modern CGI effects, most of which come across as glorified video games (our opinion - who cares) - lots of soul in the old stuff...

... the film is based in part on a pretty good short story by sci-fi author Paul W. Fairman titled The Cosmic Frame - pretty good tale about a group of little green space aliens who frame a teenager for one of their murders as an automobile hit and run death, which is incorporated as subplot to the film narrative...

... film critics always hated and for the most part lambasted these productions - they were usually always older guys - we always figured the older guys you'd see settin' alone in the rear of the theater full of adolescents and teenagers, wearin' dark sunglasses and long raincoats - and hoping, we always figured, to score a dutch choirboy...

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